We Have To Stop The (Dolphin) Bullies

by Anselm


You can read the story here.

The best line:

“He was scared, he was intimidated, he was bullied,” [Peter Wallerstein] said.

Animals do appear (at times) to be mean to each other. We’ve all seen robins fight each other over a worm. We’ve seen dogs fight, cats fight, deer fight, moose fight, etc.  Heck, some of us have even seen a good redneck fight in the parking lot of an Arby’s.

We don’t need to create another Czar over this.

Could you imagine the cries for help for the poor little bullied dolphins? How will they ever grow up and be successful in the government owned dolphin colleges?

First the big scary tuna nets, and now fellow dolphins? What is the world coming to?

I’m going to go bully the germs on my hands with some tricolsan laced soap.

After that, I’m going to bully some dead chicken parts (originally pre-bullied by Perdue) with lemon zest (bullied by a grater), salt (pre-bullied by Morton), pepper (bullied by a grinder), and rosemary (bullied by a dehydrator).

Then those parts are going to be further bullied over an open fire. (You sick and insensitive freak.)

After which they will be bathed with a honey-balsamic glaze. The honey, mind you, was bullied out of the hives of some poor unsuspecting bees. Don’t even let me get to the point where I tell you the story where all that bacteria bullied the wine to make balsamic vinegar– it’s a sob story.

The point is:

We live in a world where the media thinks that everything negative is a result of bullying. If you feel bad, it’s because you were bullied. If you didn’t do well on that spelling test, it’s because you were bullied.

Does that mean that since I paid taxes this year that I was financially bullied?  That’s some anti-bullying I can get behind.

Bullying is a problem, but not everything that folks are calling bullying is bullying.